My head-on with Parents !

Hmmm. I have started more like writing randomly-on the spur of the moment- about blog 'coz b4 that i used to plan out, but never got to publish it. It's like after writing out the things going on in my head or rather after the 'emotional lava' contained in my heart has been spilled on the paper, it cools down n dries up -not going to the point of bringing about a fertility in the soil that it eroded while thrashing out of the mountain and into the valley!
This time i once again choose a topic that may as well label me an extremist. I may effectively seem so 'coz my ideas are very conservative in today's modern world!

Ok. I wanted to talk about "teenage independence" related to Muslim families living abroad ! I have seen this distinct streak which clearly stems out from the Christian counterparts of letting the child be on its own a after 18 or even 16. Some decades ago it was only to earn pocket money to spend on buying personal things, but slowly it moved to adulthood activities, late nights, cinemas, nightclubs, getting drunk one-night stands etc . All being said it has nothing to do with our culture or religion. Then why is it that Muslims boys n girls r given independence as soon as they start earning when they r barely out of high school? What is it about getting a $50 note that gives them a license to let go of any boundaries their parents have set? I mean in the face of their parents they say,
" Mom, dad i earn now. So plz no questions about where i m going n when i m returning. I m spending time with my friends tonight"
"Hey. I m a grown up now. i can take good care of myself. I can't sit back following your ridiculous ideas that belong to our conservative, extremist family in Asia. As it is no one over there can see me. What harm is there in going out with a male friend of mine? It's my life. I will live it the way i want!"

I don't know what to say. When these teenagers get out of hands the parents start worrying. Coming late nights, out of their senses, weird materials (drug content) being discovered from their rooms, even weirder punk-style friends making them finally become a drop out or someone with not much good grades.  I hardly know of any person excelling in studies or being on a good post in a Big company like the way it happens in our country. When students excel they are known everywhere being called by good companies. Studies r not taken with that much fervor abroad! You would rarely hear of a family member/ cousin going abroad and being a top grader in the best of schools. To people abroad those govt. schools look so advanced- only 'coz English is the basic medium over there ,but try out the knowledge of any Asian person vs. those 'Lets try out for America's top model"- syndromed college galz n boys there!

These youngsters don't know of Namaz offering properly, they won't know of Qazah namaz, Makrooh timings, Sajda-sahu, importance of Quranic recitation ( besides finishing it once),Wazifas, Wird, Sahabas, the Shariah way of life. why interest/Riba is haraam. Why male female mingling is inappropriate. You may say that youngsters in Pakistan also not follow all this but atleast they Know about it. At least they can be made to understand with arguments. At least they have a base and don't shrink away from Islamic knowledge as if gaining it would make them Talibans!! The outside children only see a distorted version of mainstream Islamic teachings. They think partying, singing, dancing, rocking hard, music, modelling is all there as a gift of God to Muslims when they have offered Juma prayers and kept some Rozas to please their Lord!

  I won't like to leave the Pakistani parents out now. They too r slowly giving way to the Western way of life- "What can we do? The kids don't listen to us . It's alright if our daughter doesn't wear dupatta . Some of  her uni fellows even come in  skirts. At least she is more covered than them"!! Parents .. plzz it's not about comparison of social norms. You cannot live your life doing in Rome what Romans do. That cliche has ofcourse been invented by people not your Holy book. There are females who still wear a head gear and make sure their li'l girls just over 5 yrs wear leggings. They slowly try to bring their girls on the right track. Children will be what you SHOW them to be. For this reason too i don't blame the next generation. increasingly mothers and aunties are seen wearing caprice and flowing material without dupatta or saris showing off their mid-riffs.  when they see such clothes adorn their respected mothers what do you expect them to learn?

Similarly, the sons have been brought up to favour nuclear families instead of joint ones. gone are the days of a crowd of siblings living with their new families in the same grand house. only grandparents live with a couple now. but that too is now being taken in the sense of 'privacy invasion'. The newly-wed wife says "We can't talk around freely. we can't roam around or go for long drive without the disapproving eyes of your parents when we enter late night.". Someone go and ask her if she was allowed that much freedom in her home? and would someone please ask her how she plans on attending weddings or joining back office leaving her still-in-pampers baby? aren't grannies a saviour when the initial marriage fever runs off? But, no even then they are considered a bane and 'progressive , career-oriented moms take PRIDE in discussing how bad their Nanny or maid is; how often they change them or catch them cheating on food items or stealing money !!

I don't know. I blame the parents! The world may not blame you. You can always negate me here. But you know for sure God Almighty up there will ask you atleast of the teachings you instilled in him/her till your child was a minor !