Catch A Match!

I am recently going through a match making process –rigorously and religiously- with me being presented as a trophy ready to be won. AH! Dat was just to boost up my morale. I’m not sure what number of subcontinental population will be viewing my article, but those who are would know precisely what a sarcastic comment that was. Indeed a pun at all the girls being presented before prospective suitors –mostly to be not given another look. The phone call never comes as they say.

I’m not sure if guys go through the same process. The problem is the groom-judging scenario comes after the girl has been selected. Plus it is said that a man is judged by his earning potential and not by his looks or age ‘mard kabhi bhoora naheen hota’ *eyes rolling*. I’m sure very few men have gone through rejection based on their ability to provide for the bride-to-be. e.g. a good house (preferable owned , regular monthly income, nuclear family system, own car, no dependency burden of other family members, good designation, preferably settled abroad and the list goes on). But since the girl is judged first, the depression and the underlying insult comes sooner and more explicitly as the whole family waits for the ‘hum soch ker jawab daingay’ phone call. I’m sure if a girl is chosen and the family finds the boy not up to their financial standards they would also backout and the guy would feel the same insult as a girl does! After all it is pretty demeaning to be judged and rejected on your monthly  income which depends on you capabilities both mentally and physically!

I have shown both sides of the picture this time unlike other articles that display only the girl’s sides. No doubt that IS the truth that a girl suffers more b/c by the time she is chosen she has age working AGAINST her and even if the boy is below standard financially or in looks the parents are forced to be in a compromising situation.

'Catch A Match' Cafe

Now coming to the title of this article. In my imagination there is a solution. I feel that all this superficial judgment of looks and money makes the soulmate activity pretty soul-less. You know devoid of spirituality, just robotic! Where are the values, the meeting of eyes, the beating of hearts, the feeling of he’/she being the ONE? In our society it is considered more sane to trample each other’s dignity and crush the parents’ hopes than to arrange for a suitable meeting environment for the couple who indeed should talk to each other before deciding to live together for a lifetime

The title of this article ‘CATCH A MATCH’ is for a café -like setting where the parents arrange for the guy and girl to meet each other in friendly circumstances and discover each other. The café owners should make sure that they provide respectable privacy to the couple and they know the purpose of this meeting such that both families are ensured of a ‘Halal meeting’ of the prospective couple. A lot of tension would be resolved this way on both sides. Trust me if marriage bureaus start running a cafe like this they would have entries by the minute and neither the girl or guy nor their families would ever feel there was any confusion, misunderstanding, and the oh-so-clichéd ‘actually aap hamrai baat ka maqsad naheen samjhay…’

Ah I really wish it could be done that way. Would be every girl’s dream who goes through the cumbersome process of dressing up, going to parlor, rehearsing interview questions and answers in her mind and many other things. Plus it won't be anything like dating . The guy would also be relived to ask the questions that matter to him and which he cannot ask through his parents. In the process if either girl or guy has some personal issues like having a lover already, some health problem, a unique or eccentric thought process they can convey it to the other then there can be a very amicable turning down of proposal where the girl would feel dignified ! 

p.s. Waiting for the response of girls who were and are going through this phase.